Pond's Laws on Estate Planning and Retirement

On Estate Planning

Pond’s Law of Incapacity
If you become incapacitated and don’t have a durable power of attorney, the court will appoint the child you least trust to take over your financial affairs.

Pond’s Law of “Goodbye and Good Riddance, Uncle Charley”
The best way for you to show your family how much you dislike them is to die with no estate planning documents.

Pond’s Law of Family Heirlooms
The more meaningless a family memento is, the more vehemently your children will argue over who gets it after your demise.

Pond’s Law of Intestacy
If you die without a will, the state determines how your estate will be settled, and it will distribute a sizable portion of your estate to a family member who you had intended to disown.

Pond’s Law of Funeral Instructions
Your loved ones will find your funeral instructions five days after you’ve been buried.

Pond’s Law of Spousal Demise
The spouse who knows the most about the couple’s finances will die first.

On Retirement

Pond’s Law of Early Retirement Incentive Plans
All early retirement incentive plans offer a lot less than meets the eye.

Pond’s Law of Hardheadedness
Employees who don’t participate in their company’s retirement savings plan when an employer match is offered have cement between their ears.

Pond’s Law of IRA Contribution Denial
None of the reasons people give as to why they’re not contributing to an IRA have any validity.

Pond’s Law of Retirement
The greatest financial pleasure in retirement is telling your children how much you enjoy spending their inheritance.

Pond’s Golden (Arches) Rule
Senior citizens aren’t working in fast food joints because they love to work with teenagers.